Living My Mom’s Life

There’s really not a photo for this blog today. My mom passed away two months ago. She was 97 and lived a good life. I was in weekly phone contact with her since I went away to college forty five years ago and many times weekly using a lot of different methods over the years - letters and cards, photos, Presto, and finally emails via our iPads. The last year was particularly difficult for her. The emails slowly ended, and the conversations were the same every week, until there were none. She would say there was nothing to tell me because nothing changed from day to day. This, after months of not wanting to talk to any of us due to side effects from the iv antibiotic therapy she was getting for an amputated forefoot. It all seemed so unnecessary. Logically it made sense she was slowly leaving us and she was in control until the end. When she started asking for dad I knew it wouldn’t be much longer. But her last year reminds me of our current quarantine. We luckily don’t have to make almost weekly visits to the doctor. But we do have to stay in the house - maybe more than a lot of other people, but it feels suffocating at times. I am thankful for everything we have and have no right to complain. And I’m not. But every once in a while I get claustrophobic and it feels like Groundhog Day because it is. I used to like that movie. I often wonder what age would be the best during times like this? It’s all about the attitude I’m sure - just like anything else.